The title says it all. Now that the holidays are over, I’m trying to get back into the swing of a normal life here at Chez Diva and let me tell you it’s not easy. I’ve been a bit under the weather, feeling overwhelmed with everything going on around me and not in the mood to do much of anything. That includes sex. And until I read a recent posting by Bride Diva I don’t think I even thought about sex for almost a week. A reader has been married for just over a month and she’s beginning to understand why women say they have a headache.

Men, don’t get us wrong. Women love to have sex too, but we like to enjoy it. It seems that guys want to do it when they are too full, feeling stinky, bored, busy. Heck, you even like to do it ALONE more that we do. And we you can’t do it, you think about it. The Kinsey Institute at my alma mater Indiana University did a study to find that men think about sex once a minute. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? There is nothing in this world I want to think about once a minute. And if you’re thinking about it so much, why do you actually want to have sex?

Along the same lines, I watched a documentary last week that mentioned that women think about their bodies every 15 minutes. Now, it’s not every minute like the guys, but we do obsess over our self image. You put mens’ obsession with sex together with women’s obsession with their body and it equals two very unhappy people.

Now a proper Diva would tell you that she and her husband make mad, passionate love 5 to 7 times a week. Well, call me a quesi-Diva then because it’s just not happening. Perhaps I should add “Have more sex” onto my Marriage Resolution list. I’ll have to think on that one.

A Bride Diva reader wanted to know how to handle the animal in her man. She’s worried about hurting his feelings and doesn’t want to bruise his ego. It’s time for her man to learn the terrible truth - he is always going to want to have more sex than she wants to have. I think she should let him know that she enjoys sex but she can’t enjoy it every night. I don’t think it’s a good idea to lie and use the old headache excuse. Being honest is the best policy. Like everything in a marriage, you have to compromise. By no means am I saying you need to give into your husband’s every whim, but you will have to put some effort into finding a happy bedroom medium. I’ve found that playful flirting can let your man know you still want and love him but it doesn’t always mean I have to get out of my comfy jammies.

[tags]marriage, sex, kinsey institute, libido, compromise[tags]

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