In Hollywood California there’s a billboard doing telling people to do the unthinkable – cheat on their spouse. The billboard reads “Life is Short, Have an Affair” and is sponsored by ashleymadison.com. Ashley Madison is a website company catering to married men and women looking to cheat. Singles, don’t you worry, you’re invited to join the fun and try your hand at helping to ruin a marriage.

After reading some of the articles, stats, and user comments on the site, I was able to deduce the following:

1. There are over 1.5 million married douche bags in the world.

2. These douche bags are lazy because although they “love” the site, they wish Ashleymadison.com would publish some How To guides on cheating.

3. Douche bags believe you can find true love on a cheating website.

If you are unhappy in your marriage and feel that you’ve done all you can – separate or divorce so you don’t have to sneak around. Let the person you married know you want out in some way, shape, or form. Save yourself from a life of douch baggery by doing the right thing and leave or make your intentions known. At least give your spouse the chance to cheat too! If you’re looking to cheat because you aren’t getting enough sex at home, chances are your spouse isn’t getting enough either. Or maybe, JUST MAYBE, your spouse doesn’t want to have sex with you because, well, perhaps you just aren’t that good at it.

Ashley Madison claims to not encourage infidelity and in fact want you and your spouse to seek out counseling but if that doesn’t work and your needs aren’t being met then they have a service for you. Let me translate that Diva-style for you:

“If you made the half ass attempt at counseling and sat there like a steaming pile of poop for 45 minutes and you’re horny, we at Ashley Madison will gladly take your money and help you further screw up your marriage.”

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