I can give you tips and tricks all day long to make your marriage run more smoothly. At the core of the matter is the most simply complex emotional – love. Without love, all the tips, books, counselors and communication won’t make a modern marriage successful. Workable? Maybe. Successful? Never.

Ever see the movie Shrek? Remember the song that’s playing when Princess Fiona’s about to marry that little dude? It’s Hallelujah sung by Rufus Wainwright (written by Leonard Cohen). There’s a line in that song that I think every soon to be married person should take to heart.

Love is not a victory march.

Ok, let me say it again. Love is not a victory march. Get it? When you love someone, you walk the road together. It’s about truly wanting to do more for someone else. It’s about getting happiness from making that same someone happy. It’s knowing they are as happy for your successes as they are of their own. It’s about asking for help without shame. Love is giving that help without a second thought. It’s about giving the other person all the information, not expecting them to be psychic. Love isn’t a test of wills – it’s an exercise in faith. Faith that the other person will have your back, but faith they will let you know when you’re wrong and knowing how to tell you without crushing your spirit. It’s knowing when to step in and when to step back. Love’s like a dance where you both lead but still manage to look graceful.

Soon, I’ll be sharing some tips for a workable marriage partnership. The tips can only be successful if there’s the love to back them up. Have you loved your husband today?

Marriage Tips, Marriage Advice

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